8/23/07 Thursday

Yayy!!! My mommy is coming today!! She’s coming later than expected but then it’s ok because I still get to see her!!! I hope I don’t fight with her while she’s here. I always do things like that and ruin stuff.

I just realized that everyone is getting to Duke this week. Probably almost everyone is there except Ashley who is going on Friday (late as usual) haha j/k. I was filling out my iCal for next week and I can’t believe everyone else is starting class as usual on Monday and I can’t believe I really miss it as much as I do. I’m just tearing up and crying a bit (normal) but wow, I really loved Duke and miss it so much. This is the new phase of my life that I chose so I’m ok with that.

I think that really makes such a big difference – choice. Say, for example, I was at Harvard starting school this fall like my dad had wanted and I ended up having some problems. I would be less motivated to deal with it and overcome it. But here, as much as I worry or have some type of anxiety/nervousness, I’m pretty much accepting that it was my choice and I have to take responsibility for it and just suck it up and deal. Not that I really anticipate huge problems or anything but it just changes your mindset (which makes ALL the difference I think) in how you live and handle changes/problems/setbacks/difficulties/etc.

So, yea. I guess even though there will be times this year when I’m completely ready to pack my bags and book the next flight out of here, at least I’ll know that I have no one else to hold responsible but myself for being here. And it’s really turning out much better than I could have expected in many ways. =)