Friday, June 4, 2010

lucky in love.

Haha.  The title of this post may confuse you.  Especially juxtaposed against the tone and content of my previous post.  I just came from watching "Date Night" with Steve Carell and Tina Fey.  I love them.  They are both so funny and their relationship throughout this movie was so cute and sincere (at least, to me).  I had no expectations going into this movie (decided to watch ANY movie after dinner on a whim) so I was pleasantly delighted to find that I enjoyed it.

On my walk home, I saw this couple full-on making out on the side of the sidewalk.  I'm talking girl pressing guy against the side of building on her tip toes making out.  At first I was like "Get a room" followed by the eye roll.  They started walking before I reached them and I was like, GOOD.  Then I spotted them again, at the corner of the next block.  They hadn't even gone ONE FULL BLOCK and she had pressed him up against the side of another building.  They just couldn't get enough of each other.  I was like "Oh, brother" all Liz Lemon style but then, I smiled.

I smiled because I had been there once upon a time.  I had experienced that all-consuming passion.  The "got-to-have-you-now"-ness and "don't-care-who-sees-or-judges"-ness of new (and not so new) beaus.  And I got to thinking.  Despite all the ups and downs and seeming disasters on the journey that is my "love life," I have experienced a crazy array of situations, events, and feelings.  So maybe I haven't met "The One."  I'm not even sure how much I (still?) believe in "The One."  But short of finding my "happy ending" (non-euphemistic) I have truly been lucky to have experienced "love" (or sometimes perhaps lust) in so many different ways.

I am lucky to be able to recognize certain men's fragrances/soaps and smile thinking of the guy who wore it. I am lucky to have certain stores I pause outside of and think of who I went in there with.  I am lucky to pause outside certain restaurants and smile thinking of the guy who took me there.  I am lucky to have certain routes where I can smile remembering who used to walk there with me.  There are certain subway stops where I smile thinking of who used to drop me off there.  There are certain street corners where I smile thinking of who I used to meet there.  (Hmm, that last one sounds dangerously dirty - BUT IT'S NOT!!!).

So here is an edited list of some of some of the other experiences I count myself lucky to have had:

Being proclaimed as someone's soulmate.  Twice.  Being proposed to as a backup wife.  Thrice.  Trip for two to the Côte d'Azur.  Nighttime walks on the beach.  Walks in Central Park.  Walks in Battery Park.  Soul-searching conversations in Battery Park.  Getting sent home from the Duke Golf Course running trail parking lot by DUPD.  Being the one he wanted to go to the hospital with.  Roses for returning from DC.  An orchid for being pretty.  Male locker rooms at Duke.  Empty football field at Duke.  Underneath the bleachers of the tennis stadium at Duke.  Midnight grilled cheese sandwiches.  And homemade French toast for dinner.  Golf lessons.  A best friend who was secretly in love with me but never made a move other than being there for me when I needed him and always taking care of me.  At least twice.  A (perhaps-not-so) secret affair.  Grocery shopping.  Broadway shows.  Meeting coworkers.  Meeting friends.  Meeting the parents.  Meeting the other half of the bromance.  Meeting the dog.  Showers.  Being bathed like a child.  Kisses on the forehead.  Train couchette - with 4 others asleep (hopefully).  Train rides through the French countryside.  Heat rash.  Or possibly stress hives (non-STD related!).  Play wrestling - no sex involved.  Dancing until we literally fell over from exhaustion.  Someone who knows every little thing about me - even more than my Mom knows about me.  "I'm sorry" lunch.  "I'm sorry" brunch.  "I'm sorry" dinner.  "I'm sorry" ice cream.  "I'm sorry" cab rides.  "I'm sorry" highlighters.  Candles and rose petals.  Dinner at the Boathouse in Central Park.  A personalized tour through the Met.  Staying up to make me watch The Notebook.  Cookout shakes delivered to me in the library.  A whole fake duel on the steps inside Perkins Library.  Valentine's dinner with his basketball buddies.  Piggyback rides around Kville.  Semiformals.  Dancing.  Not dancing.  Walks through the Duke gardens.  Lunch at the Nasher Museum.  Cocktails at the WaDuke bar.  Pho to cure hangovers.  Morning-after brunches.  Piggyback rides around the American Tobacco Campus in Durham.  Surprise birthday dinner with my family.  21st birthday bathroom antics.  Watergun fights - with chemlab goggles.  Dorm study rooms.  Giving each other colds.  Wearing his clothes.  Finding his clothes in my laundry.  Giving me his favorite childhood stuffed animal.  Teaching me to play video games.  Getting frustrated when I beat him.  Never playing said video game with me again.  Having someone to cook hangover 삼계탕 for.  Impromptu lens cases out of water bottle caps.  Having someone to bring home leftovers for.  Having someone to order a takeout meal for during girls' dinner.  Smuggling a live animal into Bostock Library.  Having the exact same read on another person.  Rainy day movies.  Being carried to bed.  Taking care of drunk strangers together.  Sleeping on the floor.  Golfing with my parents.  Rides home.  Walking me home.  Borrowing his coat.  Talking until the sunrise.  Drinking on the raised plaza outside JG.  Playing basketball.  Ignoring foul calls.  Keggerskating.  Bus terminal goodbyes.  Bus terminal welcome backs.  Rituals.  Nicknames.  Inside jokes.  Talking until the cell battery dies.  Drunk texts.  Care packages.  Garters.  White Hanes tank tops.  Christmas presents.  I'll-miss-you-when-you-go-on-vacation-so-here's-my-favorite-sweatshirt sweatshirts.  Souvenirs.  Postcards from faraway places.  Weathering the rain and a trip to Brooklyn to feed a friend's cat.  A date that I planned and paid for.  Watching movies in the theaters.  Watching movies at home.  Watching new TV shows.  Skipping class to take naps.  Hopping around on one foot in Kroger's grocery store.  Duke basketball.  Making up.  Walking.  Ordering Chinese food delivered to my apartment and his name is automatically on the order.  Having a "song."  New music.  Concerts.  Mobs.  Getting his car towed b/c we were behind a building for too long.  Sleeping while he reads Naruto.   Shopping together.  Bloomingdales.  The Apple store.  Strand.  New interests.  Sending him off to work in the morning and being left in the quiet calm of his apartment.