Movie Monday: Lightning round!

Apparently my recent putdown of The Fast and the Furious franchise touched a nerve.  A friend and secret reader gchatted me to discuss his strong disagreement. A general discussion about movies we'd seen followed and then he suggested that I do 1 sentence (or otherwise brief) movie reviews.  Let me know if you like them!

1. The Fast and the Furious: Paul Walker and Vin Diesel are both good and bad guys ...sigh... Paul Walker and Vin Diesel ...oh, right, and there may have been some cars and stolen electronics. Also, there was a Hispanic-y lady who could definitely beat me up just by looking at me.

2. There Will Be Blood: First, it should've been called "There Will Be Oil." Second, bloodiest movie about milkshakes ever (okay, so maybe the title is pretty apt). Third, the mute-by-choice brother from Little Miss Sunshine is the creepiest and then the most desperate preacher I've ever seen. Lessons learned? Oil makes people:

• Deaf
• Greedy
• Crazy
• Use bowling pins as murder weapons
• Lie

3. Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga'Hoole: Kidnapped owlet resists brainwashing and ... maybe this one would do better as its own list.
Things I never knew about owls that I learned from this movie:

• Owls have gizzards that are like human "guts" and they react weirdly to metal so that you can make it their kryptonite
• Owls don't know how to fly for kindof a long time
• Owl battles are terrifying and awesome (especially when they have armor and talon-swords)
• A Tyto is not a type of owl, just where he lives
• And this last one is not specific to owls, but PLEASE PLEASE try to love your kids in equal measures - favoritism or even relating more to one than another leads to CRAZY sibling hatred and future sociopaths.

4. Fantastic Mr. Fox: (I have no idea what this movie was about even after watching it). Movie shot in sepia-tones (seriously EVERYTHING was in shades of brown) about fox having midlife crisis and putting his whole community in danger to feel like a hero.

5. Iron Man: BEST. MOVIE. EVARRR. Everything about my memory of watching this movie makes me SO SO happy. =D